Do you have a place you’ve always dreamed of going, or an activity you’ve always wanted to do? Maybe that’s touring a vineyard in Tuscany, snorkeling the Great Barrier Reef, or sitting at a Parisian cafe and people watching.
Has anything ever come in your way of doing these things? Money and time are common examples of obstacles for those who have dreams of travelling but haven’t yet been able to action it. However, one obstacle that often comes up is ‘not having anyone to go with,’ and that is the subject I want to elaborate on.
When I was 20 and getting ready to graduate college, I had traveled a bit throughout Europe but nothing more. I craved a different experience and without much forethought, signed myself up to volunteer in rural South Africa as an English teacher, alone. I remember telling my parents what I was heading to do after graduating and they were not excited for me, but rather, scared of their kid flying eight thousand miles away to work with an unvetted organization in the middle of nowhere. After that, my plan was to spend another 10 days in Italy. I just picked a place and, potentially a bit naively, went for it.
My time in South Africa wound up being the single most culturally enriching experience of my life. I met other volunteers from all over the world, as well as locals, and consider many of them close friends to this day.
In Italy, I was lonely at times, coming off of a two month period in South Africa where I had made so many deep friendships. With that being said, wandering around Italy was always a dream of mine, and connecting with that part of my heritage was invaluable to me. I can’t imagine having not gone, simply because no one could come with me. I have explored the Colosseum, tasted incredible Cacio e Pepe, looked off the cliffs of Capri, and enjoyed gelato by the Trevi fountain, and I think that is the most important takeaway from travelling. Your experiences will enrich and define you for years to come.
Another solo trip I took was to Isla Mujeres in Mexico. I know most women wouldn’t casually consider sojourning to Mexico on their own, but I had a very specific dream to pursue — swimming with whale sharks. This time, I didn’t feel lonely at all, I put that down to more years of travel experience under my belt, as well as maturity and pure excitement. Again, I left with an unbelievable experience that I will carry with me forever. I’ll never forget following the pattern of the sharks just below the oceans surface and jumping in the water, being inches away from the face of the shark, and swimming as fast as I could to keep up with them. I didn’t have a companion and didn’t need one, this was something I wanted to make happen and I did.
I am sharing my personal anecdotes in travelling alone for a very specific reason- to give ethos to my plea that if you have somewhere you want to go or something you want to do, you do not let lack of companion stop you.
It could be lonely, you may feel uncomfortable at times, but you are never really alone. Connection and community are all around you, especially in 2017. There are many things you can do to meet new people while you are travelling, and simply taking a few hours to research events, areas that like minded people would hang out (such as a vegan cafe in Berlin), choosing to stay somewhere more social (such as a hostel) or joining a free walking tour (great way to meet solo travelers).
If you want something badly, you must act, regardless of if your friends are able/willing to join you. They may not be on the same page as you, and that’s okay. It doesn’t reflect negatively upon them if their vision and priorities are different than yours, but at the same time, this should never stop you or serve as an excuse. Empower yourself to make the decision to explore the world and take comfort in knowing that the familiar is just a wifi signal away, like I said before, you are never really alone.
Confidently, I can say that if you just take the first step, book the ticket and GO, you will find that the fulfillment of independence and ownership of your dreams is worth the risk.